Blah blah

"Creaky" That's the first word that comes to my mind at the moment. I am hitting a sort of unexplainable seclusion. The fan goes on creaking incessantly not giving me any hope of silence. The keyboard thuds on quite nervously with pause, then enormous speed, pause, speed...the process repeats itself. In the middle of this something called receptors signal to my brain a sense of anxiety, I guess it wants to make sure everything is alright. Dunno what the brain is doing at the moment....might have buzzed off.

I live in this world. The statement does make sense, you know. I have given up thinking because whenever I do I am remembered about the title of this blog -pointless. No matter how much you care a damn about whatever, there is no point in it. So the best possible way to be happy is to be as less circumspect as possible.
I am under the delusion that I am in love. But the more I think of it, the more funny it seems to be. Whenever I tell myself "Blah! this is puppy stuff", another part of me tells me "Mate, you are in love. Believe so. Its funny being in love". Never thought teenage infatuations would capture me. Thought I was far above it. Anyway, I am laughing at that I *felt* I was in love.

My brother has switched off the television. And the fear of him coming up any moment and asking me to hand over the throne makes me want to finish this quickly. The computer clock reads 12:43 and the other one reads 1 am. Hmm.. I am far forward, or was it far backward?

I am straining my ears to hear the click of the clock because everytime I hear it, it gives me a sense of complete satisfaction that I have no control over any damn thing in this universe. Talking about Universe.....later, hez coming up.

Came from the core of my heart

I saw what I had to see
I could have seen more
It all could have been...
But I wasn't, I couldn't

There are moments,
Moments which wave by
Before you realise, its gone
Before you realise, u rue itz gone
When you realise, its too late
You smile in its fragrance
You unsettle your hair
You laugh about the folly
And go on for the 'next time'
What if there is no 'next time' ?

Life is wasted on the living
Life is not what I have seen
Its how I had seen it.

Through the green fields
Down the blue skies
Passes mankind, to his destiny
Man is strange,
He thinks one, does another
Impulse reigns in impulse
Man is not an animal
He craves but he forgives
He loves but he hides
Man is God
He can do things that He can't

When I look into the mirror
I am reminded of my follies
But today, it smiles at me
He knows I am God
I did something that God won't
Sacrifice what could have been a life
For someone else, for his life

Not my invention, nevertheless funny

I wrote your name on sand it got washed.
I wrote your name in air,it was blown away.
Then I wrote your name on my heart & i got Heart Attack.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

God saw me hungry, he created pizza.
He saw me thirsty, he created pepsi.
He saw me in dark, he created light.
He saw me without problems, He created YOU.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The rain makes all things beautiful.
The grass and flowers too.
If rain makes all things beautiful
Why dosen't it rain on you?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Roses are red, Violents are blue
Monkeys like U should be kept in the zoo.
Don't feel so angry, you will find me there too
Not in cage but laughing at you.

courtesy: Orkut

Christmas song from Linkin n Me

I don't know who to trust
Everyone feels so far away from me
Trying not to see, but tired not to see
Everyone's forcing their way outta me
Every time I try to get back on my feet
They come charging in a fleet
Time won't heal this damage, anymore
I can't feel the way I did before
Don know what the world is expecting from me
All I wanted was to become more like me
Everything that I thought I wud be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
And every second I waste is more than I can take
I may end, failing to survive
But I know I was just like me, alive
Before I was going through this.

The Golden Year

Phew!
Blogthings had once asked me to evaluate life, I gave 8 outta 10.
I rue my decision..............What more can you expect from life?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If there has been any golden times in these 15 years, it is now.
Boy! Life has turned out to be like a typical hindi masala film. Heroes, Sub-heroes, Sub-heroines, heroines.... Lotta funny moments, nail-biting action sequences, mindblowing coincidences, sentis , anticlimax and a 'happily ever after'. Not quite sure about the last thing.... heehe...

From lurking behind bushes to find the Y of X to running chased by a whole lotta street boys, life has been presenting a whole range of emotions and experiences. The Model exams seem to be something that keep happening without my notice. I mean oneday I call someone and they tell me " DEY!!! Tomorrow is Social!!!!!"
I am living on the edge.If my marks suffer, which is a very very likely probability, World would start to screw up its canines and start to bite me. But till then, adios academic books!

I am sitting here after the culmination of another nail-biting adventurous sequence. This one included hiding from the chase by an uncle of mine. Shit! only Sandeep had the presence of mind to bring along the cycle. My method of escape was the utmost practical one among us three.
Get into the nearest temple.
Literally speaking, GOD saved me.
These uncles of you don't chase you in the temple.

Well, bro coming back at 23rd. Gee.. bring something, wontya ? Oh! I didn't allude the 'something' as a person ;)
So here I am...............gulping in Appy Fizz...... "The cool drink to hang out with"

Can't sue Eveready
Had overslept

Cat is outta the bag :(

At 1 am.....I get mad, occasionally

Kabhi muskuraake mushkilon se mil gayen.... Sanjay Dutt advices me. Frustrating silence ensues between the rhythmic beats. Mein mathlab hai mera, duniya se poochna...yeh jo hue kyun hua...kis jurm ki hai mujhko miley yeh saza.... Questions left unanswered.

It has been fifteen long weary years since my inception to this 'setup'. Fifteen long years have I passed through various human emotions to attain this emotionless trance. Every unnoticed blink of my eye is recorded somewhere. In the end, at the gate of enlightenment, they will ask me "What have you learnt?'
And I will look at them, smile and say "Does it make a difference".

It starts with something, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind.....
All I know, time is valuable thing

Thus runs Linkin Park's philosophy. The walls stare at me, inquisitively. The dirt of the switchboard remains unperturbed. Fear of fall. They say exams have a detrimental influence on staying up at long hours in short nights.

Therz something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming, confusing
This lack of self control or fear is never ending
To find myself again, my walls are closing in
...................
Fear is how I fall, Confusing what is real

I see decorations below the sky at dusks. Someone wants to convey something to someone. I have interpreted those designs and lived accordingly. Who can argue that it wasn't the message those crimson lines wanted to convey?

I am God.

They say I am omnipotent. I have to know everything. I do know everything. Everything about knowing nothing, Everything about the state of knowing nothing. If I ,ie, God knows everything then why does I/he exist? Which leads me to prove that either I don't exist or God is a pathetic concept developed by humans who have lost faith in themselves. Faith.....

Best way to convey things to 3 people

" Baby I am in love with you"

No, I am in no mood to listen to your blue
Don't ring me up in the middle of night
And tell me that "shez my heart, my light"
I have had it for the past one week
Don't go for it if your heart is weak
And I mean you too, I was aving exam
When you were sayin " I do, damn!"
I am still here, I too have a heart
I wan you to know shez got me like a dart
I can hit "bulls eye" but not at her eye
And I can't go near coz I get shy
And I know you will also read this
Even if you do, just give it a miss
Becoz I ain't serious, just time-pass
Still, shez a one wonderful lass.
Anyway I have got the green light
Hope the traffic don't result in fight
Hey! how did you do it!
Gives me boost, makes me feel fit

Yeah! I still have three more to go
When everyone hits their All-time-low
I am here, living life like never before
Hope she comes to me saying " Want anything more? "

Not for the soft-hearted

They see everytime I close my eye
They see everytime I say a lie
They keep on watching me
They never say what they see
They are all the time on the prowl
with ears of vulture, eyes of owl
They know what I am gonna do next
They know what I'll do after this text
They point the finger at me again
I wanna run away I ain't sane
Paranoia pushes me into a deep hole
Its lika can't stop what I am hearing within

All I wanna know why I came to you
Step off like what you people do
I used to dream where church bells ring
Where no words of mankind sting
Sock it! I just cripped my throat
Don't look as if you gloat
Cause I know you don't, come back
These days my dreams embark
wherever I put my name to shame
My life, My pride, its broken
I had to act like I am someone

Forfeit the bloody game
Before someone takes you outta the frame.

Thoughts on 12/12/06

Blue skies and white clouds smile
They lie to me "one more mile"
I smile and ask them "Why?"
For which they but sigh

"For you to enjoy life"
This breeze advises my cheeks
"For you to see mountains and reeks
For you to never lend a tear to these soils
For you to live life without turmoils"
I confide in them, my loudest beats
" Life is a dream without defeats
Every moment is to be cherished
Remembered, nurtured, replenished
See with my eyes, all wonders
all the pink, blue and lavenders"
"You are far from your dreams
Life is waving to you goodbye"
They lament but I know its a lie
" It is my life, where I am the hero
I don't care about the way I pass
I don't care about the wealth I amass
I live not to live but to be alive"
Even the almighty Red is sad
"I have told you what I had to, lad"
It bows down and lends to night
Long up, lies a speck of light
"Jump up to catch me, I am your destiny
You must face me, never flee"
Human bonds tie me to the ground
I don't know where I am bound
Deep inside my heart or in my eyes?
I try to smile but my throat cries
" Why do you defy the truth?
They tell life begins at youth"
The light glimmers in eager
" Reach out with power, not meager
This moment will not return
You must cherish it but never turn -
from your life when it beckons
Half the time, life is a good dream
The rest half is for you to find out"